Yesterday, I saw Rockstar, a movie that was long with too much of hyper activities, yet once the lights were off it lingers on your mind. When you walk out of theatre your mind is flooded with numerous thoughts especially the ones whose seeds were sown rite from the moment you were born.
It is a simple story of a Guy who wants to be a famous singer and was initially told by an adviser that in order to be famous you must go through hard times or heart breaks. What’s interesting in the Journey is that in order to achieve he indulges himself in self destructing activities and once he reaches the pinnacle he finds himself alone and worst is that he doesn't even enjoy it as he is in constant agony. Perhaps LOVE is actually a very strong emotion to handle especially when your mind is receptive to the outside world. It requires lot of courage and strength to let it live every single day of your life because the so called society would try it best to take it from you.
From this word Love I believe comes out freedom to be what you are and do the things at your own wish not being guarded by parents/Teachers/School and sometimes even friends. I very vividly remember that when I was in school I wanted to grow quickly so that I could take decisions on my own and not have someone else taking it for me. Yet, when I moved out I actually missed it and at times felt staying at home is so much easier than to come out and face others. Because here they don’t give you any chance to come up after a failure or give a damm about what you want or think. In order to make friends you need to have a parameter on which you need to stand and pass it. For ex- If your circle is of stylish girls than you have to be like them to be with them. They would nag you endlessly till you become someone like them.
But, if you try to continue to be what you are then it becomes very very difficult. I often wonder that would I be eating a McDonald Burger every day or a Pizza weekly or a rich spicy food daily if I was the decision maker and would be living all alone. Not really because I stayed in Bangalore where from the morning tea till nights dinner I had to eat out and apart from some odd days I never ate such things. Most of the days I used to have Dosa's or Full south Indian meals. But yes whenever my friends ordered for a Pizza I wanted to share it.
Just the other day I was speaking to one of my very closed friend and when I asked her about getting married she said that she doesn't want to give up this "Independence" and be tied down to a family. Today if she wishes she can sleep till 2 o'clock on a weekend and then get up eat maggi, go for shopping and then come back late. She isn't answerable to anyone. Tomorrow if she wants to visit her friends and stay overnight she can do it without any hassles. But this doesn’t mean she is not caring and doesn’t want to be in a family. Yet that fear is always there.
On the other hands I have friends who are married and stay in a nuclear family their thought process is also the same. They say that they don’t want any "Khit-Pit" of any sets of parents. They have their own system which they have developed which they don’t want to be criticized. Than there others who couldn't get away from Joint family they have learnt to ignore and do things what they love without telling their parents.
The sad part is that parents do this for their own children but when it comes to daughter in law they don’t do it at all. This is the main reason why girls of current generation wish to stay away from home as much as possible. So that they could enjoy things they love without feeling guilty of making a bad impression. The worst is that this trend is being passed on from generations to generations. Mostly they feel that in order to keep discipline you need to behave like that because they themselves have learnt it that way. What they forget is the time itself has changed dramatically and would continue changing. If you don’t adapt to these changes you would be often caught sulking. The best way to pass on the tradition from one hand to another is to show these “girls” that there is a reason behind the way things are done and make them realize it themselves. So that they look up to you with love, admiration, respect and value it. There is no point in making them do things by force and then when you would not be there they would do things their way. Which would be quiet opposite to what you want?
I feel this is where a role of a parent comes in, when they would let their children be or do what they want and still making them understand where to draw that line. There should be so much understanding between them so that the child doesn’t even think twice on whether to share or hide. And this freedom should be extended in all relationships including friendship. It requires lot of maturity to understand this as it is not at all possible for everyone.
In the same movie when Ranbir says to "Late Shammi Kapoor" who impersonates a famous Shenai player that "classical Music is BORING". Shammi kapoor laughs without being offended. Yet, in later part of the movie he is sharing the dais with him without feeling awkward. He was honored to play with the younger counterpart. For me this was the BEST scene in the movie.
When it comes to any new generation one should simply join hands and let them be whatever they want to be and for this LOVE is the Crux. You never know their ideas and the way to deal with things would be better than yours.
I hope I can stand by it, though at times I feel it is an impossible task.
