Investment minus emotions: Is it possible with the mentality we have?

Very recently I have started reading about things I never thought of reading. But thanks to some random reading triggered from home schooling kids and pandemic situation. This random reading inspired me to read more about financial planning and investments. When it comes to finance and money what I understood till date is that you should save money. That’s how traditional and orthodox approach is, and we all have grown up with that. We never realized the importance of saving and investing.

In all the advises and explanations people said that one should keep emotions aside and then invest. Be practical and logical about these investments. Market does not care about your feelings and emotions. You feel or your gut says that this “Investment” is good is of no use. You need to do through research and go through a pile of excel sheets before arriving to a decision. But can we really do it? Is it possible to keep emotions separate from yourself then discuss and provide genuine feedback or decide.? When it comes to your hard-earned money how can you consider investing without emotions. However, I would like to highlight 3 specific areas where I realized the difference between an “Asset and Liability”.  Each one is related to emotions only and nothing to do financial planning.

 

1. House – The moment you start earning owning a house and living there is one of the most basic expectation you have. Even if it is related to taking a loan and paying EMI. I believed this is an Asset. We all have this emotional need. However, after doing research I realized that this is incorrect. If you own a property (house or flat) and live in it, it’s a liability as we would be paying a huge amount as an EMI and maintenance cost. So, if you calculate average return of investments in both the scenario then you would realize that renting is always better and economical with no headache. But can we accept this fact that we should continue living in a rented property and not think of owning a house and living in there. With real estate prices going high every year, it is becoming difficult to own a house without taking a loan. Even if we have a choice accepting this is extremely difficult. May be for generation next this would be an asset but for us a liability which we must carry as it is extremely important.
2.  Jewelry – The entire business of jewelry is based upon emotions and even the advertisements target emotions. Every company who is in this are advertising about emotional value associated with jewelry. They have associated this with all the emotional/social events that happen in various stages targeting women. Birth, graduation, engagement, wedding, birthdate, anniversaries, festivals and so on. Even currently most of the parents would buy jewelry in whatever possible quantity the moment a girl is born. However, financial planners would say that you need to buy “Digital Gold” as it is pure and there is no making charge. It’s impossible for me to even imagine gifting someone “Sovereign Gold Bond” as an anniversary gift or wedding gift. So, no matter what happens gold jewelry will always have a bright future. It will always be an Emotional Investment and not as a “Commodity Trading”.
3. Automobile- This is again a liability as most of us want to own and drive expensive cars based on the budget we have. And yes, as we don’t have so much of money, so we fall into the EMI mode of payment and take loan from the bank. Even though we understand that its value decreases the moment you take it out from a show room. We still buy or aspire to buy as we all have heard stories about our parents bragging about when they bought their first car and how they are unable to sell even if it is not working. Now, with the advent of OLA and Uber this has changed to certain extent. There is no need to own a car, but people still buy the same and upgrade it as well. Another emotional attachment which is difficult to get rid of.

 Hence, these are somethings where I feel whatever be the repercussion, but these emotional attachments would remain as is and very few people can get rid of these things. We spend a considerable amount on gadgets as well but that is not included because no emotions are attached to it. If one had access to and can afford would be upgrading every single day. No one is holding on to a mobile as a personal item which is indispensable.

Not sure how next generation behavior pattern would be as they are very much careless about things they own. They are shocked that there existed television which was not known as “Smart TV” but was called an “Idiot Box”. Emotions at that time was not related to the switching of the internet and I recall the power cuts where we used to talk to our neighbors daily. Now you hardly know the neighbor. Hoping that whatever be our investment strategy or financial planning we should not forget to invest in Education, values, health and personal relationships.

By,

TulikaJV

10/11/21

8 Business Ideas that you can start with little or no investments.

Lockdown in India was extremely difficult for each one of us in so many ways. With everyone staying at home looking after the household chores and Home schooling. It was difficult to handle things.

However, I saw many of my friends setting us small businesses with little or no capital. Slowly and gradually, they have built a small name for themselves.

Below are the ten ideas which you can use if you are gifted and yet not sure how to go about doing this.

1. Online Teaching: - When we were children, we never imagined attending school on a computer at home. Till date I have a mindset that training, and learning can happen only when you are physically present in a class with an Instructor. You have friends with whom you can discuss your problems, get suggestion, and collaborate for any report of assignment. But now this has changed completely. The entire education system across the world is now online. This is across any type of course you want to take and starting as early as nursery. Apart from schools there are lot of online platforms where you can publish your content with respect to course and you can even get paid. Setting this up in Udemy or Unacademy is extremely easy. Even if you don’t want to resister with these companies, you can take online tuitions. For this you need to have the acumen and knowledge, credentials are not big deal.

Now a days this is not just related to Academics but can easily be done even for drawing/chess/gymnastics/phonics etc. And they have customers for these things. All you need is basics of Facebook marketing /Instagram marketing, and you are all set.

2. Home Baker : This is not new thing but it became very popular because all the local shops were closed and most of preferred to take these things from our neighbors. From Brownie to Bread to Puff to basic cake and in some cases they even made fancy cakes. With assured quality and timely delivery this was a cool thing to do. Here as in some case they bought ingredients only when the order was given in a couple of days in advance. However, if you are a home baker and not professional it is very difficult to plan for things in advance. Eg, a day before or on the day of delivery they can come and say “Sorry, it is not done”. That’s fine as this in very occasional and they try to be professional as much as possible. Needles to say social media exploded with numerous home bakers who were even trained to make fancy came. Not to mention some of them bought fancy equipment’s. This was extremely supported by local community.  

3. Content Creators – Be it Instagram/Facebook/YouTube we saw everyone creating content, you could easily see some kids singling #bachpankapyaar being viral or some other trend which came out. From random videos to well thought content everything was available. Some became influencers by just doing a regular content. From big production house to small businesses everyone was reaching out to them for a paid promotion. The more viewers you get the better is the reach. You can easily find jobs a s a freelancer or being associated with a particular company or brand.

4. Book Publishing: Thanks to the time at home with practically nothing to do , people started writing their thoughts on a piece of white paper. Because this lockdown gave plenty of time especially if you don’t have children. Even someone like Priyanka Chopra admitted that this lockdown gave her the time to finish her book. #unfinished. Ofcourse, you should have a flair for writing. Even if you don’t have a money producing a Kindle edition is extremely easy with many Apps/Website helping you to do so. 

5. Yoga/Zumba/meditation/dietician Trainer: - This is again something which can be started very easily. Get some training and start taking online classes on Zoom/Google Meet. Charges, timing everything can be flexible. Create some fancy profile/pages to promote and start promoting.

6. DropShipping:- In this model the seller purchases inventory as needed from a third party—usually a wholesaler or manufacturer—to fulfill orders. So if you know a fancy wholesaler in Orissa or Kanchipuram or any other place. This is the time when you can connect with them and sell on any of the social media. No need to set up a shop or even maintain any inventories. 

Details :-  Feel free to google this term and read as it is very interesting topic.

7. Cloud Kitchen:- If you are in IT , you would have definitely heard of Cloud Computing/Cloud CRM, Cloud Architecture and so on. So what is this Cloud Kitchen now? 

It’s nothing but commercial facilities built specifically for food deliveries. Sometimes they are also called shared kitchen, virtual kitchen or even ghost kitchens. Which in simple terms means that there is no building where this restaurant is based. You simply register on Swiggy/Zomato and start taking the orders. In this you can use your own kitchen for receiving the orders. 

Do Read the Link :- https://www.thehindu.com/news/national/rise-of-cloud-kitchen-concept-in-india/article34787157.ece

8. Affiliate Marketing:- In simple words it is just associating your self with a simple company and promote their good. If it materializes than you will get a small percentage share. You can use your friend circle to promote these goods. However, in this basic knowledge of digital marketing helps. https://affiliate-program.amazon.in/

These are some of the things that my friends are using to generate income and I found them good so sharing the same. Also, it would be extremely helpful if you can do a digital marketing course, so you have a fair idea on the usage of social media platforms.

 Lot of free links are available to give this training.

Now is not the time !!

 

Now is not the time,

To be a critic,

And criticize everything around,

But to acknowledge what is good.

Now is not the time,

To scold children,

With too much screen time,

But to understand they are at home with no school.

Now is not the time,

To write hate message,

Or troll for a trivial fact,

But to support each other.

Now is not the time,

To Crib, Cry or Sulk,

But to remove it,

From the corner of your eyes and heart.

                    (1)

Now is not the time,

To hoard things for yourself,

But to restrict the usage,

To bare minimum.

Rather, now is the time,

To say a silent prayer,

For each one of us,

So, we can not just survive, 

But thrive on the same. 

                         (2)

Yes, I am afraid!!

 

Yes, I am afraid,

That when my daughter-in-law will come,

My son will not give enough importance to me,

And he will listen and be defined by her.

 

Yes, I am afraid, 

That my thoughts and my beliefs, 

Will never be taken ahead, 

In the precise manner I do or believe in.

 

Yes, I am afraid, 

That I would not have enough money,

As a result, things would not be in my control,

As it is there today when I am earning it.

 

Yes, I am afraid, 

The taste of my son would change, 

And it would be different from what he likes today,

And worst he might not even like what I make. 

                     

But, If I believe in these things and be afraid, 

Would not I be denying the happiness a person brings,

Would not I be giving too much importance to me, 

My beliefs, My thoughts, my culture, my desires.

 

Yes, I would be doing exactly that, 

Then why not chill and relax,

Wishing that whoever comes in his life, 

Treats all of us with Love and respect.

 

More than this values him,

And together they build a beautiful path,

And walk hand in hand forever... And ever,

Taking care of each other throughout.

                             

By 

Tulika Jyoti Vardhan.

12/11/20

Why?

Why are we so bitter,
Why are we so annoyed,
With small things,
Surrounding our day to day life.

When we all of us know,
One thing for sure,
When you eventually die,
Nothing almost nothing can come with you.

You won’t even remember,
Who said what!
Who accepted you with open arms,
Or who criticized you every single day.

You won’t even know,
Whether you were a success or failure,
Or how much money you added in the wallet,
Or simply spent every last penny.
(1)

You won’t even know,
Whether you gonna die,
Is it in the corner of your room,
A hotel or any super specialty hospital.

Yet, we walk through life,
As if we know it all,
Assuming our belief/rituals are perfect,
And it is above every other person.

Yet, we want our children to learn,
Keep our traditions alive even if they are reluctant today,
When all of us know for sure,
That once you go, you simply go..

You simply go!
Leaving memories behind,
Friends/Family who would recall your words,
And feel the empty space you would create.

So all you can do while alive is “TRY”
To fill each moment with countless memories,
That brings a smile on people around,
And make stories worth sharing with others.
(2)

By,
Tulika Jyoti Vardhan.
5/4/20

COVID 19 Impact

How COVID 19 will change our thoughts/beliefs forever.

COVID19 A New Normal | Work From Home | Digital Work Space| Home Schooling

I would not be lying if I say that I am totally consumed by COVID-19 and every small news affects me in one way or another. Never in my life I ever seen a situation where everyone is trying to maintain a distance as much as possible and staying home. Despite having all the freedom in the world. People are ready to give up maids/household helps just to stay safe. For those who can’t avoid going out are taking all necessary precautions.

You will have people walking wearing a mask on roads and there was a time when even in peak of pollution chaos in Delhi NCR this was not taken up. Avoidance of mass gathering is considered, and families are avoiding birthdays/parties/Puja/creative classes etc. I have a kid who is 6.5 years old and he also understands that he is not supposed to play out till month end. Hopefully!

Even if it goes off it will leave an impact in more possible ways we can imagine.

• First and foremost, we all will learn and appreciate the work done by our house helps/society helpers/security guard etc even with the money we pay them. If they don’t come for a day or two, we panic. With a lock down of weeks slowly we have adjusted to this routine and learnt to most of the work by our self. Things will never be usual self again.
• Ordering food from outside or eating out was common once or twice a week but now we are all eating inside and making most of it. Social Media is flooded with videos and post with respect to cooking. Especially with easy to make snacks items for kids. From baking to Dalgona Coffee everything is being tried at home with all available ingredient.
• This curfew like situation which has come up without any political mess up or any war. It’s unbelievable how things have unraveled over the past few days. You go to a grocery store and you don’t see any items used in your house on a regular basis, you get scared of things to come. From hand sanitizers to surf to fresh vegetables etc. This is much more than shortage of onions and salt which we had earlier.
• Prices of all essential goods will increase, transport cost etc.
• Wearing a mask would seem to be a new normal and instead of looking with a surprise we would be more considerate towards the person. This would be more like a norm as some would wear it against pollution and some would for cough and cold. Whatever is the reason we won’t be surprised if this becomes a part of uniform. 
• If we come to know that someone is sick the easiest thing to be done would be call up the person first and check on the person rather than visiting the person. Sad, but now I don’t think if someone falls sick, would be getting the level of personal attention we got from friends outside our families.
• Home schooling, will come to limelight and you never know in India also there would be a process and acceptance of students who are home schooled. Very recently I was inquiring with a teacher for my son. She said, she would take a web based or skype call to teach. Ofcourse at that time I refused to do the same. Now I think this would be a norm. As video call gets more accessible and cheap to people this would be very easily done. This is already working well in U.S.A and other developed countries. Would soon be very much possible and affordable. Kids will adjust to this video conferencing studies through Zoom or any other channels.
• We would keep washing our hands , avoid touching face as much as possible. 
• Any cough/cold or fever would be checked immediately to avoid any complication or issues. Even now I had to go through a CT scan and what came out was a cough due to Pollen allergy and season change.
• We would not be able to eat street side food with the same zeal and enthusiasm as we used to do earlier.
• Work from home is now a necessity as going to office is extremely difficult and may not esquire any questions hence forth. Neither it would be looked with anxious with a claim that your life is so easy as you have wok from home. We must understand that work from home makes you do more work than a normal day. Plus you don’t get a half hour lunch break/coffee break etc. No one to talk to and discuss the issues. No personal touches. 
• Going forward we would all think twice before touching any one or shaking hands. Hugging would be out of question apart from near and dear ones.
• More respect for people who clean your house, your roads to places you work at. This is required more than ever especially with so many diseases roaming around just to grab a host. 

More than anything else we must change our behavior and thoughts to support each other in good or bad times. May not be in person but through phones/emails or videos. Doctors/Medical industry would make lot of money as anxious parents would rush to them for consultation. I vividly remember when I was growing up no body bothered to take you to a doctor unless you are really sick. Hence, I have grown up avoiding medicines. Post pregnancy and two c-section I am more prone to pop up a medicine than endure the pain. Also, I believe age gets you as well. However, for kids it is totally different scenario one day of sneezing and coughing we take it to the doctor. Even if we know the medicines. Don’t want to take any chance.

Sincerely praying for us and everyone around that we are able to beat this and many other diseases that will come our way. Amazingly, so much of technology and machine learning is still not enough for curing this. God only knows what future beholds for our children.  However, we must appreciate every day that passes by. 

Thanks,

Tulika Jyoti Vardhan

(19-03-2020).

How I wish!!!

How I wish for time to wait,
Wait for me so that I can slowly sip my tea,
By turning pages of a crisp and fresh newspaper,
Skimming through Politics,
Through BIG words of Editorial to sports and to Page 3.

How I wish time to eat,
Without flipping through channels,
Or waiting for some work to be done,
Or trying to ensure kids eat well.

How I wish I had time to read,
With no disturbance and sound,
Binging into the words written in books,
Rather than watching or hearing it online.

How I wish I had time to talk,
Just sit in a group and conversation would begin,
No botheration about background/caste or culture,
Not just talk but listen to what others view and journey.

What amazes me is,
When we had the time to do these things,
We never bothered and valued,
What small things like these meant?

 By,
Tulika Jyoti Vardhan
(27/2/20)

Let Go..

I Let go…

I let go of an early morning drive,

To the best dhabha in town,

Just to eat Aaloo Parantha with Chai..

I let go…

Travelling with friends to new places,

Or the late night shows,

While in a training or while working,

Due to fear and my own inhibitions.

I let go…

Of friends who wanted me to be there,

In odd hours and listen to their stories,

Heartbreaks or any other topic under the sun.

I let go..

Of buying anything new and big,

Even though I badly wanted,

By convincing me that it is TOO EXPENSIVE.

Now, at this juncture,

If I could, would go back and tell myself at that time,

Don’t let go of things that you love,

Take necessary precautions and do at least some of it.

No matter what you do and say now,

The time that went by, Will never come again.

As you grow old, you have responsibilities,

There are thousands of things you need to think,

Before you can pack and Gooo!

Even if you can do all such things,

It would never be same again.

And some of the things would appear silly,

Or health won’t support these choices.

So, do what you want to do NOW,

Be what you want to be NOW,

As when time turns on you,

It won’t stop any time soon.

By,

Tulika Jyoti Vardhan.

25-11-19

My Lady!

My Lady, do not crib, cry or sulk,

When someone says nasty things to you,

In your office or personal space,

Simply smile and let it go.

For they are fools and don’t understand,

The value of things being done,

Day in and out,

With lot of detailing and care.

My Lady, don’t feel so bad,

For clothes that won’t fit,

Just try and take simple steps,

And See the difference it makes.

Every tiny step you take,

Feel free to do it at your own pace,

With smile in your eyes and happiness in your soul,

And witness its impact on all of us.

My Lady, for once don’t ever forget,

You are a mother and whatever work you do,

Or whatever work you don’t do,

Or the way you look!

Makes no difference in your kids’ life,

Rather what matters,

How you feel when you are around them,

And this will be engrossed in their memory.

At every step, you will have,

People/family criticizing for your choices,

My Lady, you do whatever you feel,

Is in your best interest.

Above all these,

My Lady, do not forget to smile,

Even for a while,

Just before you sign off for the day.

All said and done,

You are what you are,

Created with lot of care by GOD,

So, don’t judge or devalue yourself, No Matter What!!

By,

Tulika Jyoti Vardhan
(28-5-19)

What Just Happened?

What just happened?

To that book with a page folded,

Lying there silently,

With characters waiting to be unfolded.

What just happened,

To that beautiful dress,

Bought once with care and love,

Worn once but kept with care.

What just happened,

To those friends,

Who would come and talk,

Sitting silently or during a walk.

What just happened,

To the places you once visited,

With zeal and enthusiasm,

Now it is a vivid memory.

What just happened,

To those dreams and aspirations,

Which nagged you day in and out,

Now seems to be a distant memory.

What just happened,

To that beautiful smile,

Careless, carefree and bliss,

Now it hardly stays for a while.

Sitting on the chair,

Staring at the laptop,

With the “To Do” List,

And yet wondering what just happened.

Where did I lose,

Thoughts, dreams I choose,

Now it seems as if it belonged,

To a different person in a different world.

Pondering between thoughts,

Running between work, life and kids,

Will there ever be a tiny “Moment”?

To realize what just happened?

Because what just happened,

Was a phase that passed,

A phase that changed,

Making you a “grown up” person.

By,

Tulika Jyoti Vardhan,

29/3/19

Silent Words Works?

A question mark or an answer,
A view or an opinion,
Credited or Debited,
Hard to say or Hard to recognize.

What Works when words are unsaid,
Or What happens when said but unheard,
You keep Working at it without fail,
Silently in background.

Like those background musicians,
Or that team who helps in writing that perfect script,
Or that chorus singer who hit the right chord,
At every single pause.

Who knows their names or values,
Who knows how much effort is put behind.
It remains silent right there behind you.

Silently they move and keep it moving,
Without much expectation to be recognized,
It works synchronously,
Shining brightly right behind.

No one to notice,
None to hear,
None to give credit,
None to make it visible.

But if for once the silence STOPS,
To take a pause and change tunes,
Or write its own script,
It has power to Disrupt and Stand Out SILENTLY.

By,
Tulika Jyoti Vardhan
(30th June 16)

Time!!!

  

Why is it that sitting by yourself,

In a small room and staring at a blank page,

Makes you feel  alone,

With no interest whatsoever.

All you do is recall,

The time that went by,

The happiness that was yours,

Isn't there anymore.

Be it that odd shopping,

Where you went through every shop,

To get a pair of shoes,

Or that exclusive dress which you liked the other day.

Be it that book store in your neighborhood,

Where you went simply to see,

What new has come or chit chat with someone,

Standing behind scrolling the index just like you.

Be it that roof top where you spend hours,

Gazing at empty stars,

Talking to them,

As if they were real people.

Or those movies or shows,

Through which you sat,

Over and over again,

Yet never got bored with it.

All those strangers you met,

Only for a day or two,

Yet you remember them,

As if you see them every day.

Amazingly these things you did alone,

As seldom you had people around,

Yet now after so many years,

You want to do same things all over again.

No matter how hard you try,

Since time snapped by,

It can never be brought back,

To make you feel like before again!!

 By,

Tulika Jyoti Vardhan

30/9/2013

IF I could just lay my hand......

IF I could just lay my hand,
On a Remote controlling time,
Would simply press Pause,
And let the time stand still.

Not see the time for a sec,
As it moves ahead,
Simply stay where I am ,
And watch the time around.

Stretch my leg,
Put hands underneath my head,
Close my eyes,
To see beautiful dreams.

With no thought to disturb,
No one who calls,
No one to say,
What I need to be doing.

No one to ask you to move fast,
Think fast, Learn fast,
Just Stay still,
And watch Silence move slowly.

Like a bird flying in the sky,
Or like a wind blowing around,
Or without making single sound,
And gaze at an empty space.

“Space” is what makes you run,
With every rise of sun,
A need is always created,
For you to make space and be NEEDED.!

By,Tulika Jyoti Vardhan
(28th Nov 2011)

Independence Streak!

Yesterday, I saw Rockstar, a movie that was long with too much of hyper activities, yet once the lights were off it lingers on your mind. When you walk out of theatre your mind is flooded with numerous thoughts especially the ones whose seeds were sown rite from the moment you were born.

It is a simple story of a Guy who wants to be a famous singer and was initially told by an adviser that in order to be famous you must go through hard times or heart breaks. What’s interesting in the Journey is that in order to achieve he indulges himself in self destructing activities and once he reaches the pinnacle he finds himself alone and worst is that he doesn't even enjoy it as he is in constant agony. Perhaps LOVE is actually a very strong emotion to handle especially when your mind is receptive to the outside world. It requires lot of courage and strength to let it live every single day of your life because the so called society would try it best to take it from you.

From this word Love I believe comes out freedom to be what you are and do the things at your own wish not being guarded by parents/Teachers/School and sometimes even friends. I very vividly remember that when I was in school I wanted to grow quickly so that I could take decisions on my own and not have someone else taking it for me. Yet, when I moved out I actually missed it and at times felt staying at home is so much easier than to come out and face others. Because here they don’t give you any chance to come up after a failure or give a damm about what you want or think. In order to make friends you need to have a parameter on which you need to stand and pass it. For ex- If your circle is of stylish girls than you have to be like them to be with them. They would nag you endlessly till you become someone like them.

But, if you try to continue to be what you are then it becomes very very difficult. I often wonder that would I be eating a McDonald Burger every day or a Pizza weekly or a rich spicy food daily if I was the decision maker and would be living all alone. Not really because I stayed in Bangalore where from the morning tea till nights dinner I had to eat out and apart from some odd days I never ate such things. Most of the days I used to have Dosa's or Full south Indian meals. But yes whenever my friends ordered for a Pizza I wanted to share it.

Just the other day I was speaking to one of my very closed friend and when I asked her about getting married she said that she doesn't want to give up this "Independence" and be tied down to a family. Today if she wishes she can sleep till 2 o'clock on a weekend and then get up eat maggi, go for shopping and then come back late. She isn't answerable to anyone. Tomorrow if she wants to visit her friends and stay overnight she can do it without any hassles. But this doesn’t mean she is not caring and doesn’t want to be in a family. Yet that fear is always there.

On the other hands I have friends who are married and stay in a nuclear family their thought process is also the same. They say that they don’t want any "Khit-Pit" of any sets of parents. They have their own system which they have developed which they don’t want to be criticized. Than there others who couldn't get away from Joint family they have learnt to ignore and do things what they love without telling their parents.

The sad part is that parents do this for their own children but when it comes to daughter in law they don’t do it at all. This is the main reason why girls of current generation wish to stay away from home as much as possible. So that they could enjoy things they love without feeling guilty of making a bad impression. The worst is that this trend is being passed on from generations to generations. Mostly they feel that in order to keep discipline you need to behave like that because they themselves have learnt it that way. What they forget is the time itself has changed dramatically and would continue changing. If you don’t adapt to these changes you would be often caught sulking. The best way to pass on the tradition from one hand to another is to show these “girls” that there is a reason behind the way things are done and make them realize it themselves. So that they look up to you with love, admiration, respect and value it. There is no point in making them do things by force and then when you would not be there they would do things their way. Which would be quiet opposite to what you want?

I feel this is where a role of a parent comes in, when they would let their children be or do what they want and still making them understand where to draw that line. There should be so much understanding between them so that the child doesn’t even think twice on whether to share or hide. And this freedom should be extended in all relationships including friendship. It requires lot of maturity to understand this as it is not at all possible for everyone.

In the same movie when Ranbir says to "Late Shammi Kapoor" who impersonates a famous Shenai player that "classical Music is BORING". Shammi kapoor laughs without being offended. Yet, in later part of the movie he is sharing the dais with him without feeling awkward. He was honored to play with the younger counterpart. For me this was the BEST scene in the movie.

When it comes to any new generation one should simply join hands and let them be whatever they want to be and for this LOVE is the Crux. You never know their ideas and the way to deal with things would be better than yours.

I hope I can stand by it, though at times I feel it is an impossible task.

Random Thoughts from a sleeping Mind!

I read somewhere that thousands of thoughts cross your mind in every single second and it’s important to take care what is passing between the ears. But than what happens when the mind loses its interest in any of the thought or perhaps any activity which is lined up? Or it behaves the way it does when you are sleeping in the night.

The reason why this thought crossed my mind is because I feel no matter what we need to fill our day with some activity or the other else it’s yet another day which is added to the number of days wasted in life. And worst is this realization comes only when your mind is not preoccupied with work or any other subject and you feel that nothing around you is going well. When you seem to share this with people, the immediate expected reaction is that something is wrong within your family or did you fight with your Boy Friend etc especially in case of girls.
None of them could fathom that this could be a resultant of not being able to do thing as much as you think you could do and absolutely unable to break out of this vicious cycle comprising of interest/work etc. When I go to sleep I realize that my day is wasted and then get up knowing that you have to face the same world to be disappointed yet again.

I wish there would be a way so that we could freeze the world outside and reorganize it the way we want. But then that’s an impossible task right! You simply can’t do it! Neither you can change yourself to the demands and do the necessary adjustment by not giving a DAMM. How long can you avoid getting effected by the ambience around you and concentrate on yourself and see that you come out with flying colors and learning. Is this realistically possible? At times I feel it’s bookish gyan which is baseless, then there are times I feel that it is very much possible. You would wish to be surrounded by “ Beautiful Minds” that would inspire you to work more than you can and fall in love with what you are doing.

Then again where do we find such people? Half of the crowd that you walk with are mostly self centered, have very little or no talent at all and yet when you talk to them you would feel that they are “Know it all “kinds. When you let them speak for more than 5 minutes you could see they would have switched from one subject to another without any synchronization. On top of it they would advice you and tell that it’s “YOU” who is the problem. It’s really difficult to survive in between these people who are sitting in the middle layer of our country across all sectors be it Politics or Private companies.

Amazing thing is that you can’t just avoid it and sooner or later if you don’t stay away you might just start speaking or doing like that. Work is the place where we tend to spend 60 to 70 percent of our life if that’s not what you are enjoying than is it worth the money you are taking for it. The underlined question is to find out what you enjoy most?

Is it so easy to figure this out, as I am still struggling to find out that one thing where I don’t feel I am giving any effort and feel the stress? Till now I have experimented with few career options yet none of them made me feel that this is just where I always meant to be. Yes, I do get that odd instinct when I see others but when I attain that place I don’t find it interesting enough.

In my short life, till date I have done some variety of work- from working as a Technical Support in a top notch MNC’s to working as a Software Engineer and now as a consultant. Although I am new to this consultancy thing so I won’t comment on it but other places I didn’t enjoy at all. I always felt I needed to do something Better and that’s what adds up to your anxiety. People around me fail to understand that and it gets really difficult to make someone understand that you actually have no idea about what you love doing and that too when 25% of life has zipped in front of your eyes.
There was a time when I wanted to be a travel expert and roam around beautiful countries exploring new places just like one of those anchors in discovery or take pride in being the lucky cricket commentator and share dais with the likes of Sunil Gavaskar. Then there was a time when I wanted to buy Mc-Donald’s franchise or a pizza hut. Have my own company,be a writer etc etc.

I have no freaking idea what exactly I want from my life, hopefully when I grow very old and look back I would have lot of experience. Till now one thing I have learnt is that you actually need to get up and speak when it is required else people will walk all over you without even bothering.

Zindagi Na Milegi Doobara!

Saw this movie last week end, found it a bit lengthy yet it ascertains the fact that we do actually have one life to live. Who wouldn’t want to live for the moment and make the most of it, but is it realistically possible in a world where you have so much to cater to and live almost like a machine.

A machine that gets up in the morning does some work at home goes to office, comes back in the evening , watch the idiot box with same moron serials or a movie and doze off to sleep This thing is repeated day after day and with a blink of an eye weeks turn into months and then years. You have two days as a week end which goes in doing some pending work and rest in Malls. When you look around you have to meet a standard which is already set, you have to adjust and make your way whether you like it or not. Whenever there is a festival, or any event the roads are blocked and it’s you who has to maneuver your way out in spite of all the sulking.

When you run through the day you hardly realize that the day has gone by with nothing fruitful done and on top of it you were not able to take up the extra task that you thought you could take up. The lifestyle has become so fast that today I can’t watch any movie more than two hours, it’s just difficult to concentrate that much and I get restless. I prefer to eat at McDonald’s or KFC than sit in a restaurant and wait for the orders due to time constraint.

Everyone expects you to do things quickly from the Project Manager to you yourself who expects a service. Even when it comes to teaching kids I have seen people getting agitated when they have to teach them anything more than once. You try and put everyone in the same bracket and equate everything.

Needless to say that you have a responsibility whose weight you have to take all your life. You simply can’t open your eyes and feel yourself lighter. Responsibility is actually very ironic, with time it only increases and increases. Many would say females have more responsibilities than men but then when you sit down to think about it and analyze it you would realize it’s not true. Most of the times you find yourself revolving around that centre called responsibility.

Tell me how many of us can pick up bags and go out on a trip to another continent. Forget about the other continent, how about a place near about your state. Wouldn’t it be difficult? There are so many constraints money to begin with and rest follows. Today scenario in many household has become such that a Maid Servant decides when you are going out and if she doesn’t turn up your day is screwed for some reason or the other.

You tend to feel that you need more and more money to have access to the word like happiness and peace of mind and perhaps that’s the reason where you try to take up work which gives you more money so you can have a Euro Trip in some phase of our life.

When it comes to me, I would love to be in a place where there is no time constraint where I plan my day at my own will. For eg, today the weather is fabulous a bit cloudy, drizzling with wind blowing gently over the face. Wish I could roam around or sit in the balcony with a cup of tea. See even a simple task like this is not possible as I am in office.

Looking out..

looking out of window,

from my office's desk,

I can see clouds hanging in the sky,

ready to break apart and fall...



I wish I could go out,

for a walk holding hands,

let the tiny drizzle of water,

brush my face..or kiss my feet.



And listen to a soft track,

from that same diary whose pages..

are kept in some part of eye’s mind..

which you seldom tap into.



or sit in a huge soft chair..

in the balcony of yours..

with a cup of tea and fries...

recollecting people you knew once..



People whose company you enjoyed...

for a minute or for years..

Yet, they all seem to be living..

far far away where you can’t reach...



it brings up that smile back,

on otherwise boring day,

When you look out the windows...

And watch it FALL..at its own pace & will.

Kashmakash (22/05/11)

Yesterday, we went for a movie that I was not so keen on seeing as it looked like a period drama which I don’t usually enjoy. Since it was a family outing I had to go, moreover it was based on a Rabindra Nath Tagore story which I hadn’t read before. Keeping fingers crossed, I went ahead with the flow. Movie began in a hall which was empty, Maximum 20 people were there.

First thing I noticed was the lip sync which ascertained the fact that it is a dubbed movie so the dialogues made by the protagonist didn’t appear as convincing as it would have been in the original movie. I wonder why a producer like Subhash Ghai didn’t apply his experience and used subtitles instead of dubbing in Hindi. This film could have been shot just the way Ravan was made in two languages Hindi & Tamil even the star cast was different in both the versions.

Apart from this the acting could have been much better because of which some key moments didn’t come out as it should have been. You were left wondering “Oh this happened”. The best part of this movie was the story line which lingers through the mind. For instance we can’t even imagine getting married to a person whom we have not seen. Today we try to know as much as possible about our respective partners before we take the step. Even though there are so many moments we feel whether we have made the right choice or make an effort to change the person we are married to. When you marry a complete stranger whom you have not seen or spoken to, than you simply can’t make out the difference between “X” or “Y”. The only thing you could have heard is the name. I wonder would Ramesh would have realized the swap if the wife didn’t tell him her name?

Another thing difficult to comprehend was a girl waiting eternally for a guy who came in and then again left without giving any information which I felt was not right. However, the beauty of this story was that it makes you feel that a human mind is an ensemble of emotions and capable of handling lot more than we actually give credit for.

In spite of this I wasn’t impressed with the movie, my friend said that’s because I am a “Band Bajaa Baraat” type and hence it is difficult to understand such movies. Yes I like movies like “BBB” or “Dabaang” but these are not those movies that would inspire you to think or make you see a different perspective of life.

My type of movie is something that fills my heart with hope, makes me feel if I could put my head down and sit to do something or the other I can do it even if I am not doing it. Something that makes me cry, subtly tickles me to a laugh or something that makes me a part of it, not like an outsider sitting in a row and watching. Till date I have seen a good variety of movies both English and Hindi. I am a diehard fan of love stories and I can watch it if the movie has some good looking actors.

One thing is for sure that it is very very difficult to make a movie exactly like a book. This means that I would actually sit down and read the story itself “Nauka Doobi” by Rabindra nath tagore to find out what I felt was right or wrong. Is it my thought process that I couldn’t like the movie as I was told. Or the movie did not lived up to the authors expectation.

Would read it soon for sure! Till than eagerly waiting for Kung fu Panda !

Raise your head and Smile!

When someone comes by you,
With a comment out of blue,
Tears come in your eyes,
Yet, Raise your head and smile.

When you hear people say,
Others are success while yours.
Is still a Question mark?
Yet, Raise your head and smile.

When you can’t dress as well as them,
Or can’t speak as well as them,
Or can’t do as well as them,
Yet, Raise your head and smile.

When you are trying,
Every single day,
Still not able to do things exactly required,
Yet, Raise your head and smile.

When food comes on your plate,
You might not like it at all,
Some leaves & vegetables set,
Yet, Raise your head and smile.

If you won’t this beautiful life,
Would become bitter,
And often you would cry alone,
Until you learn to Raise your head and Smile!


By,
Tulika Jyoti Vardhan

Recognized!

It’s just weird how small thing in otherwise boring day gives you so much of happiness that you want to grab your pen and write about it (in my case keyboard). No I haven’t got a promotion or a wonderful appraisal but I am overjoyed with the fact that my name appears automatically when you search on Google. Not a big deal! I know but still I love every bit of it.

“Recognition”! Perhaps is one thing we fight for every single day of our lives, right from the moment we are born till we take our last breath. Leading an invisible life at a work place or at home is very sad. You tend to start finding fault within yourself and become cynical of things around you.

When you come to office every single day of the week and find yourself sitting alone with almost no work you regret it. What adds to your pain is the fact that people are least bothered whether you are coming or not. Fighting this is not as easy as it looks because you simply can’t approach people and tell them about yourself just as when we were in school we used to often write an essay on “Myself” probably an act to know one self better. There are HR people who would try to have a common even where you participate and get to know others. These events are held once a while and the scale varies from time to time.

You sit in the corner and glare at your workstation wondering when you would get a chance to have your say in this new place. That’s why whenever we leave one place and go to another we tend to feel that the place where we were previously working or living is far better. But then there was a time when you were new there as well. This “invisible” status takes time sometimes it takes days and sometimes it takes months to establish oneself. Amazingly, this feeling remains same whenever you begin something just like the first day of school/college/office even change of office etc.

At times I envy people who stay at home and their lives revolve around the house without the headache of coming to the office. They can do things at their own convenience and get a lot of “Me” time where you can do things you would enjoy like reading your favorite love story or watching a movie. But then when I see my friends who are staying at home I see frustration in them as well, as they find themselves with no work once husband goes to office till he comes back. It’s not that all of them are unhappy because there are some friends who are very happy to stay at home and lead a peaceful life.

Coming back to me, I am still figuring out what I want to be in life ahead. Believe me there are times when I feel that I can write a daily soap and work with Ekta kapoor so that the standard of serials improves.

At this moment I am working on something which could be something I would enjoy at some point of time as it’s mostly based on “Cloud Computing”.

Let’s see! Till than I am in “invisible status” at office.